It was a beautiful ceremony and I'm really glad I attended. However...
I have been grappling with my practice, particularly with the aspects of being part of an organized "religion." And there's no way around it, the KTC is very structured and organized. So much so that I declined the generous offer to be on the board of directors for 2014. Serving on the board requires an oath of office, basically "pledging allegiance" to the Karmapa (the head of our lineage who represents the embodiment of all buddha activity), the pecepts and tenets of the Kagyu lineage. To take that oath means upholding and always representing the views of the KTD and KTC. I just can't do that. As I said, I'm still grappling.
After years of seeking and dharma study, I felt (and still feel) that Vajrayana is as close as I can come to finding a set of practices that are meaningful and beneficial to me. I discovered His Holiness the Dalai Lama twenty five years ago and since then I've considered myself a student of his teachings and his brand of Buddhism. (Before that I dabbled in Zen and other Mahayana practices.) Buddhism is complicated with many variations.
KTC in ABQ, NM |
You can see the similarity to Christian churches-- one on every corner in America, each with their own set of precepts and peccadillos. Which brings me to the crux of my issue and angst. It was this kind of nitpicking and divisiveness that drove me away from Christianity as a teenager. While I must admit that in general Buddhism is more tolerant and forgiving than my "bible belt" experiences, this oath-taking and pledging of loyalty to one sect is more than I can handle.
We could have a lively discussion about why lineages and traditions are so important. In general I have great confidence in our "whispered transmissions" that have been passed down for over a thousand years. But, I still think blue deities (as seen here in my favorite Medicine Buddha iconography) might be ancient aliens. Even HHDL has laughed with a twinkle in his eye when asked about that possibility, and did not dismiss it! Namaste!!
PS -- I'm about to embark on a new blogging process called Still Grappling and may do that on a new site or platform. I will link here for those who read or care ;) It's mostly for my own sake, as is all my blogging and writing. But I always love and appreciate feedback. "May it be of benefit," as my dear Pema Chodron says. (Acharya Ani Pema strongly admonishes fundamentalist views -- yay! And, beloved Thrangu Rinpoche is her Abbot. She also takes spiritual direction from Shambhala Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche, who isn't KTD, or even Kagyu. My kind of gal! ;) )
3 comments:
BTW, "Tibetan medicine recognizes three basic types of illness, the root causes of which are the conflicting emotions -- passion, aggression, and ignorance. Myrobalan (the plant held my Medicine Buddha) is the only herb in the Tibetan pharmacopoeia that can aid in healing each of these three types of diseases.
This is like the action of the Buddha of Healing, who has the power to see the true cause of any affliction, whether spiritual, physical or psychological, and who does whatever is necessary to alleviate it."
That was from Thrangu Rinpoche's info on on Medicine Buddha. Love it!!
I'm Gelugpa but I don't think we have as structured an organization (except maybe the FPMT.) In my experience, we tend to be in the lineage of the particular monasteries or lineages of our teachers. I can definitely understand your hesitancy in taking an oath. Making a promise like that can be uncomfortable, even if you value the object of the pledge. Good for you for knowing your own limits.
Thanks TMC! Really appreciate feedback, especially from a Gelugpa Gal ;) I considered myself a "G Gal" before I even knew what it was (smiling again.) I just knew I wanted to follow the kind of principles and Buddhism taught by HHDL. Love that "monk."
When I tried to find a like-minded sangha here (other HHDL followers in ABQ), I discovered two Kagyu centers. I also learned (a few years back) that HHDL appointed Kenchen Thrangu Rinpoche (a Kagyu lama) as the primary tutor for the then-young Karmapa. HHK17 (http://kagyuoffice.org/karmapa/) is now in his 30s and seems our best hope to keep Tibetan Buddhism alive and well worldwide in the future.
Anyway, that's how and why I came to Kagyu in the first place, and why I still grapple. I hope a couple of my Buddhist "gal pals" chime in on this discussion, and again, really appreciate that you took time to comment. Namaste!
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