100 books

Oh, I wish I could start posting to the new AKSbook.com But for now, stay here with me. This is a post I will never be able to recreate -- the feeling of getting several boxes of books, but all one hundred of them with my name on them. First copies of my novel arrived (actually on July 29)! These are what I affectionately call the FDO Limited Edition (For Dick-heads Only.) I thank David Hyde for use of that term. He was the creator of the original FDO 'zine back in the day. He has blessed, and is now participating in, our new FDO Group on Fbook. (go check it out, even join up!) I have the pleasure of saying that Tessa Dick has joined our group. She is the fifth and final wife of Philip K. Dick, the subject of our group discussion and upcoming festival. Yes, we're all heading to Nederland Valley (wherever the heck that is, a canyon on Highway 119 in Colorado, near Boulder) to participate in two 1/2 days of Phil-phun. We're Phil-fans and we have Phil-phun (Dick-head humor.) I'll be selling as many of these 100 FDOs as possible there... come buy one!

What's Really Real?

My novel is being printed right now! It's the weirdest feeling. I felt sick when the upload was underway. I've calmed down, but only because it's a Limited Edition run. I know I can still fix flaws before it's truly published and placed into the worldwide distribution system. I cannot explain how unnerving this is. It's been mine for so long. My story. Now the world is going to scrutinize it, examine it, judge it. I really understand why Harper Lee and JD Salinger went underground.
I wanted to share this because the feeling was unexpected. I don't hear other writers telling this side of it. Maybe they do. Send me a link in comments if you see blog posts or articles on other authors freaking out. Anyway, a box of FDO (for Dick-heads only) books will arrive by the end of the month. I will stare at the box and say, "Is this really real?" A box of my books? Holy Mushroom, Batman! I could sure use some of that PKD Salvation in a spray can about now ;)

Two Weeks!

Sorry about the lack of blogging and tweeting, but I had only one choice: finish editing and formatting the novel. Any available time, and some culled from not sleeping, have been spent trying to make this book the best it can be. At least the best this initial FDO edition can be. The Limited Edition FDO (For Dickheads Only) copies will be here in two weeks. And that's after I finish some final tweaks today and tomorrow and upload the final copy.
Yeah, I know, I was going to do that last week, but I continued to find spelling and formatting errors. So, this is where it stands now. I assure you this initial run must arrive in two weeks so I can share with friends and then get on the road for the PKD festival in Colorado. I'll post a better update AFTER that upload! Just wanted to say that soon the new book blog and and a lot of tweets will ensue! And, Happy BD KD!

proving my legitimacy

One of the things I truly hated about working for government was justifying my existence. For those who don't know, a significant percentage of government workers really are worthless "bumps on a log." They lack incentive or initiative, probably because they've been beaten down by arrogant supervisors or politicians.

On any given day, I could walk into my office in a cheerful mood, ready to accomplish something, and immediately be attacked by some ass who wasn't sure I was earning my pay. So instead of being productive, I would spend the day proving what I had done over the past week, month, or year. It was demoralizing.

I swore when I retired from government I would never waste my time accounting for my work or actions again. Wrong! I spent an inordinate amount of time a few months ago justifying a dental claim. And, now, with the novel, I've had to justify and explain myself to bankers, lawyers and publishers. I am sick of this. So sick, in fact, I wanted to toss the book and all the legal BS into the trash and just forget it.

It seems no matter what we do, from traveling to writing to just living, we are constantly forced to prove our legitimacy and justify our actions. I hate it! I want a real Independence Day. I vow not to explain myself or my actions, not once tomorrow, July 4th!